North Korea. When you pronounce this name you would expect that a secret spy from there to come near you to kill you, or threaten you, so dangerous this country is to be considered. Is to be said that this country is democratic by name, but most certain there is some sort of communism going in there, for sure.
“It’s just a little country” you may say, but yea, it has one of the greatest military powers ever invoked on the overall basis. This is one of the most retarded country this world has to offer, being one of the cruelest forms of totalitarianism, seen from the outside, having an eternal president in the position of Kim Jong-un which is put on the military and the external position.
The president of the parliament, the one who is theoretical the ruler, is another Kim, more precise Kim Yong-nam, what’s with the names?. It’s still one of the countries that have concentration camps and there are credible reports of chemical experiments made on political convicts.
It has one of the most xenophobic policies in the world and has a religious culture that borrows from all cultures. They have no access to the internet almost at all and they are forbidden to interact with foreign citizens unless if it is controlled or some sort of control at least.
Their long term plan is to reunite with the South Korea once again. Good luck with that, I don’t think they wanna have the same shits as you do, even if you are one of the greatest powers in this fucking world. You are quite fucked up and trust me, don’t expect a thing. I think it’s more probable to unite with China that with your fellow brethren.
For the North Korea, the drug market isn’t just a hobby. In the 70’s, as a following from the fact that they refused to pay their international debts, this Korean ordered the embassies to auto finance, to take their matter in their own hands and make the greenies cause the country has no way to finance them no more.
So the embassies tried more ways to resolve that matter. With selling lemonade in front of the embassy it didn’t work, no matter how sexy were the secretary dressed.
The stand-up comedy with communist ambassadors didn’t work as well being a total failure and in the end all that was left was the meth selling basing on the fact that the ambassadors have immunity and they can’t be searched, people profited this aspect and they made the carries all sorta traffickers.
When they saw how well they are the authorities from the North Korea entered as well in the stage. So they opened factories and they started to produce the purest meth which could be found on the market, 99%, purity guaranteed Walter White. Of course it was the purest.
Instead of someone producing in an illicit way in the fucking basements, it was produced by the state, in authorized factories under the surveillance of well-known chemists very well trained.
Having all these considered, from 2005 from this day, all the business privatized itself, the meth is still on the market but the quality lowered dramatically, in other way of sayin’, not even the meth isn’t what it used to be.
Regarding the statues all North Koreans agree the fact that they don’t give a fucking shit. Statues, what statues, you mean the public bird toilet? All the Koreans are indifferent, except those two, the dad and the son under the stage name of Kim Jong–il and Kim Jong-un which they made hundreds of statues of themselves made by order.
Having considered of how many statues those two made in the last 60 years we can tell that they’ve become experts, those who made the statues so why not take advantage of that and make statues for friends as well? Amongst the clients there are Angola, Egypt, Ethiopia and even Germany, all the statues made by Mansudae Art Studio, a giant statue factory with 4000 employees.
The most impressing order was made for Senegal and it’s a African renascence monument, meaning a huge statue measuring 50 meters made out of bronze realized to commemorate the realization of 50 years of independence of Senegal.
8. Kim Jong-Il and the planes
There is the moment to have in first sight the wise leaders from this country. Amongst the most known odd facts of the deceased Kim Jong-Il it is the fear of flight, the only method that he would feel safe was the train mode, making his transportation with the 6 trains, armored to its toes, custom made specially made for him and not everywhere, but only in one of the station build specially for him, evidently.
Every train had an awful lux, having lotsa conference rooms, bedrooms, big-ass TV’s from the 90s and satellite phones. It used to be said that he ordered lobster and cognac via chopper on the train, every time he felt like. All of those in a country in which the young are feeding themselves with tree bark much more often than you’d believe.
7. Life of Kim Jong-Il
The fact that he was a bad-ass with the cho-choo’s it isn’t the only dubious aspect when you mention this mothafucka. Not even by far. When he was still in the power place, his official biography was published, on demand in which he was looked upon like a God, shocking…
According to the official report he was born on the Baekdu mountain under a double rainbow and a new star appeared on the sky in the moment he was born. Like really, that’s what it says. Wait, there’s even more. We learn that he learned to walk at 3 weeks, he wrote 1500 books and he is a cinematography expert. Even more he could control the weather using his psychic states and many more.
The North Koreans opinion is that yes, it’s all true, don’t put me on arrest man, pretty please.
6. Shin Sang-Ok
It is one of the funniest happenings when Kim was 3 weeks old and he wrote books towards the public. In 1978, the most famous director from South Korea, Shin Sang-Ok and his wife Choi Eun-Hee were kidnapped from Hong-Kong and brought in the North Korea at the order of Kim Jong-Il, also named double rainbow which planned to make a movie industry in the North Korea.
Shin made 7 propaganda movies at the dictators demand which has the producer role in the movies. Cool. The most famous of them it is Pulgasari, some sort of North Korean Godzilla which tells us the story of a little doll outta rice which comes to life and becomes some sort of mythical creature of propaganda which helps the proletariat to take over the monarchy which corrupted their country. Like really.
Till the end the couple succeeded escaping after 8 years while a movie festival from Vienna. Poor guy, 8 years in stressful atmosphere where you are watched like every step of the way, but nonetheless the escape was much sweeter than if it was after a year or two.
5. The Americans from North Korea
Seems like hard to believe but there are Americans which ran into the North Korea outta their own initiative. Since the end of the war 6 American soldiers passed the border and they remained happily in the North Korea.
Amongst the most famous is James Joseph Dresnok, an American soldier which in 1962, in bright day light ran over a mined field found at the border of the 2 Koreas directly in the warm arms of the communists. Since then he was an usual in the propaganda movies, almost every time portraying diabolic Americans.
He is still living there with his wife and his 4 kids and he says that he doesn’t regret at all the decision. Fairly speaking we don’t have the ways possible to know if the man is sincere or not but most certainly he was brainwashed cause he is willingly exposing himself to that harsh environment and was one of the lab rats in which they tried to attract other people to come up in their country.
4. Special Troops
After we all know, this Korea has one of the biggest armies in the world as well as one of the most numerous special troops of the army with 180.000 active members.
This soldiers extremely well trained are frightening deadly, the special troops are always prepared for an attack and makes periodically reconnaissance missions in the South part. In 1968, 31 members of a special unity went down in the Southern part with the intention to assassinate the president of that time.
Happily they were saw by some kids which gathered wood for fire and who announced the cops. There followed an army ambush after which 29 of the soldiers were killed, one was taken hostage and one got away. Really love that they’ve failed cause I kinda hate this country for the solely fact that it isn’t fucking normal. Who would like to be caged like a fucking monkey on their own soil? Nobody. And there isn’t no internet as well, what a dumb fuck shit. They aren’t normal.
3. Kim Jong-Nam
Is the biggest of the deceased double rainbow Kim Jong-Il. And in quality of the 1st born he should’ve been at the steering wheel today.
Unfortunately in 2001 he was caught and arrested in an airport from Japan cause he tried to get over the border under a fake name with a fake id. At the questioning he admitted that he was going to visit Disney Land. He was given to the authorities from China which intended to give him further to the Koreans.
Unfortunately after the unusual event the boss said he didn’t want to be his brother anymore, exiling him to China and took him from the succession from the throne putting Kim Jong-Un instead.
2. Kim Jong-Un
Having considering the heavy talking about him and hopefully the authorities from there will never be able to read this article. Please don’t betray me. Please?
He is the actual dictator from the totalitarian state which is roaming in the same manner as his father. We don’t have so many info’s about the new leader, the few things we know about him are from his ex-school-colleagues from Switzerland which described him as a not so smart guy or interested in studying but fascinated by basketball and Michael Jordan.
He is kinda fatso to be interested in those things, and short as well. Don’t really see him as a player in this sport… we also know that he was caught with a BDSM magazine. In rest we can assume that he was born under a triple rainbow, at his birth it appeared a new galaxy and he probably planes in kidnapping Quentin Tarantino to produce a Korean variant of Kill Bill.
1. The daily life
Till the end, leaving aside the leaders, how is the daily life in North Korea? Having considering that it is one of the most isolated countries in the world we can assume that the citizen aren’t having access to any kind of external news and probably they know very few about what is happening in the world and which is the life standard in other places.
The medium salary is quite low, but there are public services in health and education only that neither health or the education isn’t the same thing that we know. You can be locked like any time for anything, without explications. Actually lotsa citizen have condemning for years cause they made themselves a cigar using a newspaper with the leader on the front.
There are some little weird things which I would regard them as being in the bright side of the story, marijuana is legal and there isn’t at least a picture with mundane people that are having publicity with old folks in the whole country.