To be honest this year’s movie pool was a little small, having not so interesting pellicles to see as the past years. And the movies weren’t all that contending.

Except maybe 2 or three films and in the rest the gala was taken much by surprise in the Best Picture, no one seeing coming, me neither. I even didn’t know about what movie it was about till I downloaded it and made me understand what they were put against. The most retarded movie. At least it had a good ending, and a bit emotional as well.

The Oscars represent the best of the best with the most prestigious award in the whole cinematography area, being the equivalent of Tony Awards in theatre or Emmy in the music business and engulfs all the best movies that were present in the previous year and have something to say.

Like really, there were the crème de la crème, with no movie to question at all, all of them having that something special that could make it take the motherfucking prize. Even if in this year there weren’t all that good as in the previous years we had some pretty interesting surprises, the Star Wars: The Force Awakens, even if I personally awaited this movie like breathless, nobody seemed to care about it, and didn’t get at least a fucking nomination. You people are serious?

You can read plenty of reviews about the film Star Wars: The Force Awakens on IMDB

It was a movie of cha’ching, motherfucking billions and you did not give a rat’s ass on him. But I will put it as a bonus in my top, not wanting to upset any fans at all and still make a pretty accurate top in which every element is represented by its something.

8. Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Pretty good movie if you were to ask me that didn’t get any fucking thing in his pocket, even if the producers spent $200.000.000 estimated on it.

And they succeeded to make up for that sum in the first fucking week, having not less than $247.000.000 and a little something more over up their sleeves. In total it gathered $930.000.000, hack of a sum, that makes of for that missing at all. They are capable now to buy another 100.000 statuettes like the Oscars for themselves, being so motherfucking rich.

Awesome storyline that sticks to the previous not making any discordance between the present and the past, lotsa intrigues, lootsa action with pew-pews and boom-booms and a little bit of romance added to its taste between Han Solo and Prices Leia. But it still didn’t receive a motherfucking thing.

Maybe it was outta their league or something that they didn’t want to eclipse the other poor movies that looked, sincerely, like crap, I can’t compare any of the movies nominated with this one. Not at least one!

I personally hated that Han Solo died, being one of the minuses in this film, but you don’t mess with the scenography. I did a spoiler? Who the fuck cares. If you didn’t see the movie do, or else you don’t deserve to live bro or sis, or whatever the hell you are, a transsexual or dunno.

7. Bridge of Spies

Sincerely I didn’t understand a thing in this movie, that was supposed to trade someone over some fucking retarded soldier, and in exchange there would be declared peace or some sort, stupid movie, I sincerely don’t recommend you to see it unless you want to waste your fucking time.

And I’ve seen it at the cinematographer as well, see the waste of the time and my money, being forced as well to waste time seeing some crappy trailers that anyhow I’d see them on YouTube. And the only reason that I’ve paid a preposterous amount of money to see was the fact that Tom Hanks was starring in the movie and fuck, it’s Tom Hanks, how can’t you love him after that retarded movie with a retarded character by a pretty decent actor called Forrest Gump.

If you want a little nostalgia, we recommend you to watch Forrest Gump on Amazon Instant Video

And they wasted a lot of money from their bank, like $40.000.000 or so just to fuck up a perfectly good scenario that could induce more action into it, but noo, let’s make the people watch something passively in the movie even if they are fat and fucked up to be more passive.

Show me some action man, that’s why I pay you for. Not the exchange market. I know that is fucked up as well, but don’t show me that. Please. Pretty please, with a cherry on top, or else I won’t pay you the money anymore bro.  In the first week they got like $15.000.000 and overall like $73.000.000.

Long short story… a crappy movie with a huge actor. And a secondary actor, being the only thing that movie win at.

6. Mad Max: Fury Road

I sincerely don’t appreciate those kinda movies and was as well a pretty good waste of time, at least I didn’t paid the entrance to watch it.

This was like the other extreme of Bridge of Spies. The other one had too much substance and this one too much action. What the actual fuck? The script is a post-apocalyptic made by a retarded man probably with a fucked up life that thinks that he is the king of the world.

Anyhow, I won’t wanna happen this kinda shit cause like Picasso said” If you can imagine it, it exists”, and the guy who imagined it must be hanged or something if something bad happens, bringing us in their era if we do so.

Their budget was around $150.000.000 and had a disappointing gross of $153.000.000, close to a fail, not to mention that I did not see any Mad Max fan till this day. We would wanna see birdies or kangaroos, not fucked up people that drink blood and oil.

Induce something nice to me, not the end of the world, and the most annoying part of this movie was the fact that all the lines were doubled. What the actual fuck. I felt like in a Japanese action movie and if the music industry wasn’t enough to make me barf from their playback, the movie industry did it as well.

You are not normal man, trust me. Especially if you play in this sort of movies or watch. It’s the same fucking shit. But the people from the Oscars seemed to like it, giving awards, LOOTSA  them to this stupid picture for the following categories: Costume Design, Film Editing, Makeup and Hairstyling- of course you’d give a prize for someone that had the entire pallet of choices for the movie, Production Design, Sound Editing- What the fuck?!.

5. Room

A pretty good movie with lootsa substance, maybe even too much in which we are kept mouth open like the entire movie. But it is booring you may say. Shut up.

It is, but it’s worth to see a scumbag piece of shit being ruined from all he had. I’d wanna see hanged this kinda people, like in the middle ages, you get me. I’d loooove that, I’d even pay to see that miraculous spectacle.

Overall a decent movie that succeeded with only $6.000.000 to make it be noticeable by the movie elite and take a place in the Oscars nominations. And with so much spent they realized a double gross of like $14.000.000 and get out of the dump to do more interesting movies in the future.

The only thing that annoyed me in this movie was, along with the fact that I didn’t notice that her little girl was actually a little boy, the fact that it didn’t seem to end, even the whole action happened in a motherfucking room and you could not explain the expenses, only for the actors maybe cause otherwise you could not understand what that meant. The only thing that this movie won at was the Leading actor by Brie Larson, the main actress. In rest, nothing important.

4. The Big Short

Interesting movie from which I understood lotsa things, like how the market works, being one of that movies from which you could really learn from.

Lotsa quotes and situational examples from which you could understand the mechanics behind the banks and money flow. This one sincerely was one of my favorite making its way towards my heart. It was through the nominees but didn’t have the guts to win at the most important thing, Best picture.

Instead it won in the Writing category, the Adapted Screenplay, having a big impact I may say in the way it was written and transmitted to us via the actors in the movie. It really lightened up the room being one of those movies that is hybridized with a motherfucking documentary. It really looked like one.

You can read an interesting review about The Big Short on The Guardian

I sincerely recommend this movie to anyone that is interested to do something big in his life, with lotsa turn-ups, just like in the real life, lotsa interesting facts, lotsa action as well and beautiful screen-play.

3. The Martian

An emotional and yet comic movie in which Matt Damon succeeds in making us believe that he is stranded on a distant planet in which we never had the opportunity to explore yet and still making it believable.

Superb playing, being the most serious contender for the winner this year, Leonardo DiCaprio. But despite all of those the only thing that this movie got was… nominations. Only nominations. Poor little movie. Did I say poor? This movie wasn’t poor at all with a budget of $108.000.000 and grossing of over $228.000.000, I’d say that this movie was a total success in spite of the fact that was not a winner at all.

I adored the turn-ups, the music, being some kind of musical more than a serious film, but still, one of the best production the year that passed. I really recommend it for the big mass, making us realize what a serious shit is to be a cosmonaut, if we ever did think of becoming one.

2. Spotlight

Lemme be frank with you. I didn’t enjoy the movie at all even if it received 2 Oscars, one for The Best Picture and one for Writing (Original Screenplay).

Of course the lines and the script was kinda ok, but the story overall it only described the journalists work, which sincerely I don’t appreciate at all, looking for shit to write about and defame, hey, just like I do.

But in this case it only made me watch the acting, the reactions, the bad screening and all, not at all immersing, I sincerely spotted everything that was wrong in this movie, like the hunger for fame, money, kids in this movie, the journalist work, that sincerely, isn’t all that hard.

The acting was kinda poor, the storyline showed everything that is wrong in our system and society and I sincerely knew all that and I would like not to be reminded of, cause I like fairytales still. Let me be a kid once again please. Pretty please. A simple waste of time for 2 hours, if not more, in which I found no pleasure to watch only to tell you the crap I’ve watched.

Read more reviews about Spotlight on IMDB and don’t forget to check out the awards and nominations section as well

Don’t watch it if you have a brain, trust me. But it still had won two prizes though. Watch it if you are a kid and you have no fucking clue of what’s happening in this world.

1. The Revenant

Brilliant movie, with a terrific improve from Leonardo DiCaprio in both his struggles to survive, crouching all around the soil in search for his survival.

The movie took two Oscars, one for the Best Actor and one for Cinematography, less than that crappy Mad Max… Fuck the movie industry. You should’ve given this movie more credit for what it was. Still one of the best movies I’ve seen in years, describing the struggle that a man has to offer in order to simply survive the bad characters in life, making it one of the most immersive and realistic pictures that I’ve ever witnessed.

You can check out on Vanity Fair how Leonardo DiCaprio celebrated his first Oscar win

The only thing I have to reproach is the fact that at some point a cell phone is being heard in the pellicle, not minding to change it or to cover or something for fucks sake. Shortly, a movie you don’t want to miss in life. Wink.

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