Longevity seems to be the keyword which our parents and grandparents are looking for when in terms of interest from the internet. Not a taboo area, not as hard as you may think to obtain, interestingly it is based mostly on our regular basis habits, it’s not like buy an super expensive face cream and voila it’s all done.

Most people think expensive stuff are miraculous stuff that are kept under key for the wealthy masses, well it’s not. I have an aunt that borrowed from my mom like 500 euros only for those kinda treatments, crèmes and lotions, expensive digestive and hair shampoos from a random shitty company that was advertised on the net, something Russian and not decipherable.

Garbage I’d may say considering if they would live a normal life like the old folks used to do, with cold baths during wintertime or saunas, with mud from a random place, with food that isn’t cultivated only in water feeding it like they are pigs, I think it would surpass those expensive crap. But… people are lazy and prefer the effortless choice. ”M’eh, it’s the husbands’ money”.


10. Do what your body ask you to

oldest veteran, Richard OvertonRichard Overton, who has been called the oldest living veteran, adds whiskey to his morning coffee and smokes up to 12 cigars a day, he claimed around his 107th birthday.

This seems the most logical and rational reason of all 10. You don’t need to be really obsessed and if your well-being depends of some vices, why don’t you do as your body asks you to?

Let’s face it, a small substance of any kind didn’t hurt anyone. Only cyanide, but don’t mind me. The body has the power to cope with substances and eliminate them fast if they aren’t necessary for our body.

The body has its own intelligence, talking to you from time to time, you know that saying “trust your guts”, eh that is literally only just because we evolved as individuals and having no one to consult, we started to talk to ourselves and having others around kinda started missing the whole view around us.

Your guts are right and have the power to amaze you, just because at some point you we’ll look at the fridge and have no clue of what to eat and say to yourself” What am I going to intoxicate me with…” and looking around there you see something you ate yesterday morning and didn’t seem appropriate any more like a Lebar and you hear your guts scream “ that’s garbage, throw it at the dog, or even better burn it up cause the dog will insult you if you feed him with that crap” .


9. Don’t drink alcohol

world's oldest man, Alexander ImichAlexander Imich of New York City, formerly known as the world’s oldest man, said he didn’t drink alcohol. Why is that a reason? Well first of all alcohol burns and burns inside of you as well, ageing your cells in the burning process, like a fast paced living, living in 2 hours like other in a week. It’s an extrapolation of the idea to make a point but nonetheless, it speeds up your ageing process as hell.

Second of all, a large amount can kill a various area of your cells, forcing your body to regenerate and not being able to recover any nutritious substance that would be required to feed any starving cells, and they die as well at some point, earlier than required, making your system age prematurely like baby teeth and grown-up teeth, having your cells dying at a fast pace. Especially your brain cells.

Third of all, alcohol is just a digestive kind of supplement and shouldn’t be abused for clearing your thoughts. The problems will still be there, trust me, even if you forget them.


8. Dependence

Depedence of any kind reduces your life expectancies shows most studies on people over 110, seemingly they renounced those dirty habits and prolonged with over 15 years than most people seem to live if they abuse or simply consume a vast area of substances.

From coffee to people that don’t wanna hang around us anymore but we want, talking about children about here, most people tending to forget about their parents and grandparents, being sadly more like a responsibility for them then an enjoying activity. Those kind of people seriously need to be punished in the same area as child abandon.

Smoking , it used to be said in my age that a cigar reduces your life expectancy by 15 minutes, having me asking that the initial act didn’t consume that much time, the act itself seemed to me futile and disgusting in that period. Now, I’m more like a hypocrite. Don’t mind me.


7. Restful sleep

Interestingly this is one of the most recommended advices given up by people that have past their 100’s birthday. It seems very logical to me, because that beginning of Alzheimer and his old age activities don’t include very interesting activities or energy sucking ones, au contraire, they enjoy sleeping, probably the only thing that seems logical to everybody, and probably the last thing they remember as pleasant.

Death is searching you at home and you are wandering the streets my dad uses to say when he sees this kind of specimens on the sidewalk, now, it seems naturally logical to me that they sleep a lot just to be prepared when the evil-black thingie comes to your door.


6. Meditation

secrets to live longerEven if it may sound stupid it’s the other way around. I’ve tried myself some techniques and had a very positive result over my mood. And if you don’t know what za fack the meditation is, you are not meant to live longer, or maybe better, not live at all.

Meditation is the total lack of feelings and thoughts that flow through your inner self, a blank space that you may later on can fill up with creative elements or feelings or whatever the hack you want. Even tried some yoga breathing techniques in which you breath in in like 25 seconds air, continuously an slowly, hold it up for 30 and release it as slowly you breathed in. Try it yourself, it’s extremely calming.


5. Attitude

attitude, secret to live longerAs a medical student I found out that random chemical reactions can cause follow-ups in the body and mind setting yourself as a positivist in perspective over life can easily add some figures no. in your year stamina.

Yo’ bro’, I’m better than yo’ ” is not an arrogant way of being it’s just healthier so don’t be surprised that everybody is better than you, that’s their mindset telling them, coming from the immune system to get you rid of retarded people, people that stick in your “circle of well-being” and will have a big influence over you in the periods to come.

They will dictate your activities, your goals, your ageing rate, so be careful what attitude do they have. Try not to surround yourself with negativists because you become happier seeing someone feeling worse than you. Bad call.


4. Have a social network

have a social networkAnd I’m not talking here about online network as many would assume, it means to get the fuck up of your bed, early for most cases, and go play for all I care-but not online- with other members of society, of your circle of interests.

If you are an adult and have a job-stressful or not, and don’t tell me stress is an ageing cause, because non stressful would make you very naïve and very probably to get hit by a train in the mall at any moment (and I’m not talking about those cho-choo’s for kids), and die at the age of 30. Connecting you with other people gets you out of depressions harm-way, keeps you active and sociable and likeable by other people and of course could establish you other new connections as well and one may be even a good friend.

We found that productive, hardworking people (even in old age) are not stressed and miserable, but tend to be happier, healthier, and more socially connected than their less productive peers.” –Time


3. Find a purpose

And not anti-ageing products. Find an emotional vessel in which you could deposit all your extra good or bad emotions, it will guide, without even asking, all your steps towards a less stressful life.

You may think “where could I find so such miraculous thing?Get the fuck out of your house, that’s where. And if you don’t have a job it’s even worse. Get a job then. Centenarians across the globe are happy people who have reason to get up in the morning.

And they are still trying to find a purpose, like learning a new language in order to travel to Timbuktu or any exotic place and relate to other old people. Stay curious, childish curious, you may never be wrong with that one.


2. Eating

secrets to live longer, healthy eatingI’ve seen all sorts of studies showing that food can vastly affect your way of life and in consequence the result after years. I’d may say they are true, but eating for nutrition your tissues is not the best argument for ingurgitate all kinda crap. Studies show that ageing is diminished if you eat less, forcing your cells not to divide any further and be capable of transmit it’s hereditary pattern to the next one, and of course feeding it ages at a face pace.

A big proportion of your diet must be consisting of plants (have you seen big canines at people?-no), seeds, roots and all sorts of stuff. I laughed when I was young at those kinda practices but I realized that in time your mood ergo your well-being state, ergo less stress, is influenced by the amount of Vitamin C in my diet.

Vitamin C and citric acid are the main essential points in the Krebs Cycle. What is Krebs Cycle ?  In the mitochondrion. What’s mitochondrion? For fucks sake you are not worth talking to, but I’m here already so shut your mouth up, you obnoxious imaginary interlocutor.

Mitochondrion is the part of you cell that makes energy out of shit. It’s the furnace as you may say, and lacking these parts of your diet, and I’m not saying “have only fruits and vegetable” cause that would be really retarded, more retarded than without them but anyhow, could drive you into scurvy(the pirates disease).

As well you might as well consider as having a serious breakfast (not like most active persons do), a moderate lunch and a slim dinner in order to maintain a good rhythm for your body.  Long story short-eat your vegetables kids.


1. Activities

live longer, ActivitiesYour life must be filled with lots of interesting stuff and activities(not totally relaxing and of course not sitting in front of you computers- like I do for instance).

Most studies show that having an passive life can rapidly enhance the ageing factors, such as hormones which aren’t produced in a normal area of values or a bad blood flow through your veins making your skin and not only, your other organs to be deprived from essential substances that feeds them, especially water.

So if you are fat… my apologies, don’t come into my house. Not because I have something with fat people, it’s just I have an underground cellar under my living room and might break under your weight “one, two, three, for, you can fall through the floor”.

Being a passive kind of person is not good for your attitude as well… nobody likes a lazy person, especially if they are fat and not doing a thing about that. Plus it’s super fun when you have basket-ball games and randomly the ball smacks you or any friend of yours in the face after it ricochet out of the ball-hoop.

Soccer as well, not to mention tennis. There are all sorts of sports you can bring your fat friends to and have a great amusing time, and get your blood of yours flowing bright.

Duranord Veillard, a 108-year-old from Spring Valley, N.Y., who has been married to his wife Jeanne for 82 years, gets up at 5:00 a.m. every day and does five to seven push-ups.– Time

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